Do you find it difficult to ask for help?

     

      Whether asking for help is difficult or not, it really depends on the person you are asking and the nature of the favor. I believe most people consider these two factors when asking for help. We automatically screen what we can and can’t ask of a certain person and are most likely to ask help from close family and friends rather than acquaintances. Interestingly, there is a study showing that asking for simple favors can actually increase your likability. Of course, this is only in the case of small favors like asking to borrow a pen or asking someone to hold your water bottle while you tie your shoe.Apparently, its because asking simple easily done favors make people feel good about themselves, thus, it makes them have a better impression of you.

For me, I prefer to ask help from people close to me but if I could do it myself I would rather not burden other people with my matters. I would feel guilty for troubling them with my problems. And when people help me without me needing to ask, of course I’m flattered and grateful but this burdens me more than when I receive help after asking. Its because when people do this, I worry that I will not be able to do the same for them. So I would rather them not do anything. Its not that I distrust them or that I think they expect something in return for helping me but healthy relationships need to have a moderately balanced give and take value. If they keep giving to me but I’m unable to give back to them, then maybe someday I’ll lose them.